Lady Folbroke's Delicious Deception Page 9

  He nodded again. ‘An inability to perform effectively, no matter how tempted. And he left before you might notice that he had given all he could. It is either that, or a penchant for other men.’

  ‘Oh, I seriously doubt that,’ she said, relieved that he could not see her smile.

  ‘It is not unheard of, you know. When you find him in London, it is quite possible that you will discover his relationship with one of his friends is … unusually close.’

  ‘I see.’

  ‘But in either case, it has nothing to do with you, or your attractiveness to members of the opposite gender.’

  ‘You think that is it?’

  ‘I have no doubt. You married a fool, too ashamed to admit a flaw in his own person. And it has caused you grief.’

  ‘When it is put to me thus, I think that is a very accurate assessment of the situation. Thank you for your opinion.’ For, although she did not think him a fool, per se, the rest of the sentence was true enough.

  But the Adrian that sat beside her now did not seem likely to repeat the mistakes he had made in the past. He took the glass from her hands and set it aside. Then he trailed his fingers along the skin of her arms, tracing the line of her shoulder and neck. It made her feel sleek, graceful, desired. ‘Think of it no more.’ He kissed her shoulder.

  ‘Sometimes I find it hard to think of anything else,’ she admitted. ‘When I am alone at night.’

  ‘And unsatisfied,’ he whispered. ‘It is a condition that is easily remedied. Allow me.’

  ‘Allow you what?’ She pulled away from him, somewhat surprised by the husky tone of his voice.

  ‘Allow me to prove to you, as I did last night, that there is nothing wrong with you. And that the disappointment you experienced at the hands of your idiot husband need not be repeated.’

  ‘Oh.’ The word came out of her, part sigh and part moan, for his lips were on her throat, nuzzling at the place where her heart’s blood beat. ‘But last night, you said you could not lie with me without using that thing you brought. And I do not think I would like that at all.’ For while she wished to have his baby, suddenly, she wished even more to feel her husband inside of her, unsheathed, and as besotted with her as he seemed tonight.

  He paused his kisses and looked into her face, his eyes sightless, but still searching to reach her, to make her understand. ‘If that one thing is so important to you, then I do not think it is possible for me to give you what you desire. There is only one woman on earth that could command such an intimacy from me. If I deny it of her and tell myself that it is done for her own good, but I give myself freely to another, I will sacrifice the last scrap of honour I have left.’ Without thinking, he touched the pocket of his coat, in a place just over his heart.

  ‘What were you reaching for, just now?’ she asked.

  ‘Nothing. It is foolishness, really. And certainly not the time …’

  Emily ignored his protests, slipped her hand into his pocket and withdrew a battered miniature, no bigger than a locket. She’d remembered sitting for it when she was sixteen. She’d been quite miserable at the time, having just recovered from influenza.

  ‘It is my wife, Emily,’ he said softly.

  Without thinking, she responded, ‘It is not a very good likeness’, forgetting that there was no way she could know. Then added, ‘Those paintings never are.’

  He smiled and took it back from her, opening the cover and running a thumb over the ivory that it was painted on. ‘Perhaps not. But it hardly matters, for it has been some time since I’ve seen it clearly. Still, I like to look on it.’ He held it in front of him as though pretending he could see it, then passed it to her.

  The question of a likeness was no longer a matter. In the place he had touched it, he had rubbed the paint away from the ivory, smearing her eyes and leaving only a white smudge in the place where her lips might be.

  ‘She was a sweet girl,’ he said, smiling and reaching out to take it back. ‘And from what I am told, she has grown into a fine woman.’

  ‘You do not know?’

  ‘It has been several years since I’ve seen her, and she has adjusted to my absence. She handles the business of the estate as well, if not better than I would. I sign what papers are needed when she sends them to me, of course. But her decisions are sound, and I have had no reason to question them. My holdings profit from her wisdom.’

  ‘You treat her no better than your man of business, then?’

  ‘Hardly,’ he said. ‘Our families were old friends, and when we married, we had been betrothed for ages, promised to each other almost in the cradle. I had no problems with it, at first. But then I learned the fate of my father, and my grandfather before him.’ He gave a wry shrug. ‘It was clear that there could be no normal marriage between us. But it hardly seemed fair to her to cry off. I was by far the best offer the girl was likely to have.’

  ‘Bloody cheek,’ she murmured.

  ‘But true, none the less. The title is an old one. The house and lands are enough to tempt any woman. By the time I wed her, she was nearly on the shelf. I had hoped that my neglect of her would put her off me. But she’d waited patiently for me to come back from the army when she could just as well have been at Almack’s on the hunt for a better man.’

  ‘Or you might have married her sooner,’ she pointed out. ‘Instead of risking your title by buying a commission.’

  ‘True enough,’ he agreed. ‘The army is a better choice for a second son. It is dangerous for an heir to go into battle. My cousin Rupert was ecstatic, of course.’ When she did not ask, he added, ‘He is next in line for Folbroke.’

  She responded with an ‘I see’ to hide her lack of ignorance on the subject. ‘And are you pleased that he will succeed you? Is he worthy of it?’

  Adrian frowned. ‘He is my nearest male relative. It does not matter whether he is worthy or not.’

  ‘Then you think he is not, or you would have answered in the affirmative without hesitation,’ she said.

  ‘He is not blind,’ Adrian said, as though that answered all. ‘And if desire for an earldom is an indicator of worthiness, then he has more worth than I possess. He wants the place more than I ever did. For my part, I expected Napoleon would finish me off before I had to admit the truth to Emily. Once gone, it would be no concern of mine. I would die gloriously and never have to face the future. Instead, a muzzle flash blinded me, and I was sent home. The surgeon told me that the damage to my eyes was a temporary thing, but I knew better.’

  ‘And did you explain any of this to your precious Emily?’

  He shook his head. ‘I am a coward, and there is your proof of it. I counted her brother as a close friend and comrade, and even he does not know.’

  ‘There is comfort in that, I suppose.’ For she doubted she could have survived the shame if David had kept the secret from her as Hendricks had.

  ‘And I have made sure that she will want for nothing, during my life or after it,’ he said, as though it would justify his neglect. ‘She is my countess, with all the comforts and freedoms that the title allows her. She has free access to the accounts, and she may spend them as she sees fit. All that I have, outside of the entail, is deeded to her, secure in trust.’

  ‘And you think that will be enough to satisfy her, as she waits your return, never knowing what has happened?’

  ‘I doubt she misses me so very much. It has come to my attention that she means to take a lover.’

  ‘And who would tell you such an awful thing?’ Since she had only recently learned that he cared at all, it had never occurred to her that her husband might have developed an exaggerated view of her love life.

  ‘Hendricks, my secretary. He is the man who helped you from the tavern two nights ago. He makes frequent trips between us and acts as my eyes and ears at Folbroke Manor. When he comes to town, I question the poor man quite mercilessly about her.’ He laughed sadly. ‘Recently, it has grown increasingly difficult for him to recount her behaviour. He
does not speak of it, of course, but he has a penchant for her as well. And I would not be surprised if she returned his affections.’

  ‘Certainly not!’ While Hendricks was not unattractive, the idea that she would choose him over Adrian was so ridiculous that she could hardly stand to hear it.

  ‘Oh, yes, my dear. One does not need eyes to see something like that. When I can get him to speak about her?’ Adrian shrugged. ‘I can tell that the respect in which he holds her is something more than what one would normally find in a servant. I force him to sit with me, share a brandy to loosen his tongue and tell me of her exploits. And through him, I have come to believe that I have quite the cleverest wife a man could wish for.’

  ‘Except that you think her unfaithful to you.’

  Emily could see a muscle tightening in his jaw, as though the matter bothered him more than he was willing to admit. ‘I merely have realistic expectations of her. I abandoned her. And I have no intention of ever returning. If I deserved her fidelity, I would be with her this evening. But I will not saddle her with the care of an invalid. Nor do I wish to live at her side as an affectionate brother, leaving her untouched to spare her the risk of bearing my ill-formed whelps.’

  ‘But have you not considered? If you continue in this way, your heir is likely to be sired by another man.’

  ‘Do you think I have not realised the fact?’ He bit out the words, sharp and cold. ‘If she chooses her lovers with the care that she takes with the rest of my business, the child will be strong and sighted. But if I were to get her with child, there is no telling what might happen. And it would leave her stuck with the care of me. She might as well have two infants for all the use I am likely to be in a few short years.’ He laughed mirthlessly. ‘Would you like to go and tell her that she must wipe my chin when the spoon cannot find my mouth? Or put me in leading strings so that I can find my own bedchamber?’

  ‘I have watched you, and it is not as bad as all that,’ she snapped back. ‘You manage quite well on your own, when you are in familiar surroundings.’

  ‘But I have no evidence that she will adjust as well as you have when faced with my disability. You have been unusually understanding, and our arrangement, pleasant though I hope it is for you, is a temporary one. But she should not be put through the bother of a lifetime with me.’ He closed the locket and put the picture back into his pocket.

  ‘Nor, apparently, should she be put to the bother of asking her what she wishes.’

  ‘It is what I wish that concerns me,’ he said. ‘I do not wish my heir to be blind, nor my wife to look on me with pity, knowing how easy it is to hide the truth from a husband who cannot see her.’

  ‘You do not trust her to be honest.’ And, in truth, she was not.

  ‘I would much rather she cuckold me when I am not present than when I am.’ He laughed again. ‘Either way, I cannot see it.’

  ‘You are horrible.’

  ‘One more proof that my wife is better off without me.’

  Adrian was laughing at her, and at their marriage. ‘And have you thought, even for a moment, how she might feel to be abandoned, with no explanation? She blamed herself.’ She wiped the first stray tear from her eyes with her sleeve, reminding herself that it was unladylike and childish, and that there was no way to know what his wife thought. So she added, ‘Or so I would expect.’

  He was watching her intently. Or rather he was listening. She could tell by the little cock of his head that he had noticed her stifled sob. ‘You are thinking of your own marriage again, aren’t you?’

  ‘Perhaps.’

  ‘And I promised that I would give you no reason.’ He gathered her close and kissed her upon the forehead, and then the cheek. And then the mouth again, his tongue moving against hers slow and soothing and then faster, as though he meant to tease her back to happiness. He whispered against her lips, ‘Let me take the hurt away.’

  She could not tell any more who he spoke to. Did he mean to make her forget? Or did he need to be free of his darling Emily, who, even now, could be lying in the arms of his most trusted friend?

  It did not matter. She wanted the same thing he did: for the pain she had carried for so long to go away, and to feel needed and wanted by the one who held her. ‘Yes,’ she whispered back.

  ‘If you allow me into your bed tonight, I will prove to you that it is possible to meet both my needs and yours. You will have much pleasure and no regrets tomorrow, I promise.’

  Emily put her arms around his neck and clung to him, caring for nothing but the feel of his body, close to hers after so long. ‘As long as we can be together, that is enough.’

  Chapter Ten

  ‘Adrian, please. No more. It is almost dawn and I swear I am exhausted.’ Emily laughed, for she had never thought to speak those words, and certainly not to her husband.

  ‘Are you sure, minx?’ His hand stole between her legs again, cupping her sex under his palm. ‘Although you have left me too weak for another go, I do not think it is possible for a woman to grow too tired for this. Let us see, shall we?’

  And it seemed she would know soon enough, for his fingers moved upon her again, as they had so many times since she had led him to her bed.

  He had not allowed her to undress him, for he’d claimed that when changing without a valet, he preferred his clothes laid out in a way that ensured he could find them again.

  She had watched in eager anticipation as he revealed without shame the body she had only glimpsed before. The years had not changed him, and she was glad of it. He was as muscular as she remembered, large and strong in ways that made her tremble to the core to look on him.

  He had come to her side, kneeling on the edge of her bed and peeled her gown away from her as easily as he had the night before, kissing her face and her body, then toppling her back on to the mattress, his nakedness blending with hers in a tangle of arms and legs and fingers and tongues. He had licked and stroked her to ecstasy more times than she could remember, and spent himself in her hands, between her breasts, and between her thighs, touching her sex with his in a way that was very close to heaven. And then they had slept together, through the night, skin to skin, so close and familiar that they might have been sharing one body.

  But not close enough. As he touched her now and dipped inside of her with the tip of his finger, she imagined him entering her, taking her as she had always wanted. She pressed herself against his hand, urging him deeper and remembering the size of him resting heavy in her hands the night before. ‘You are bigger than that,’ she whispered. And then she gasped, for he had slipped another finger, spreading them inside of her, stretching and moving faster and faster. And she discovered that she was not too tired after all, losing herself all over again in the miraculous maelstrom that she had come to expect from his lovemaking.

  ‘There, my darling,’ he said with a smile. ‘Admit I was right. Your body wakes at my touch.’

  Emily put her arms around his neck and kissed him for what must have been the hundredth time that night. ‘And now it would like to sleep at your touch as well. The fire is dying and the sun is rising, but it is still several hours until breakfast. And perhaps the servants would welcome the quiet.’ For he had reminded her frequently that he could not see her response, and that it pleased him to hear her cry out.

  But now he kissed her gently upon the cheek and disentangled her arms from his neck. ‘I had not realised it was so late. You must have your rest.’

  She reached out for him, but he had already turned from her, feeling along the edge of the bed and then taking the three steps from the corner that would lead him to the chair with his clothes. ‘You are leaving me?’ She sat up enough to see the clock upon the mantel. ‘It is just past four,’ she admitted, with a yawn. ‘You can have no other commitments at this hour. Must you go?’

  He chuckled. ‘If I am honest with myself, probably not. When you know me, you will see that I am the most idle of creatures. I sleep the days away, and my evenings
are spent much as you saw the first one.’ He pulled on his shirt, tied his cravat in a rough knot, and came back to her, reaching to find her, and kissing her outstretched hand. ‘But since I am a wastrel and a rake, it would be better for your reputation if I were not seen leaving this place after breakfast, satisfied by more than a hearty meal.’

  She sighed, for perhaps now was the right time to tell him that it did not matter in the slightest. But while they had shared a bed for hours, and done more together than she had ever expected, he had not succumbed enough to do the deed. Nor would he be likely to, if she made him angry.

  When she did not answer he said, ‘Have you fallen back to sleep?’

  ‘I am merely hoping that if I do not agree, you will not leave.’ Because this was how it was supposed to be. How it should have been from the first. The two of them together, sharing the night and greeting the dawn.

  ‘I must go, so that I might return again. And before then, I must have a change of linen and a shave, if you wish me to be the presentable man you want, and not the base ruffian you found me.’ He released her hand and returned to the business of dressing. Then he said, casually, as though he did not wish to presume the invitation, ‘If you are not busy, of course. And if you desire more of my company. My nights are not empty, but they are not so full that I would not be willing to dedicate them to you.’

  He probably meant, if she rejected him, to slip back to the place she had found him, and his inevitable doom. ‘No.’ She climbed out of the bed to come to his side.

  ‘You refuse me?’

  ‘I refuse to allow you to fill your evenings with anything but me,’ she said, twining her arms about him and kissing him again. ‘I will meet with you again, as often as you like, night or day, it does not matter to me. I have but one condition.’

  He smiled and hugged her. ‘I am yours to command.’

  ‘For the duration of our acquaintance, you must not frequent gaming hells or taverns or any other low haunts like the one I found you in. While you may not think yourself worthy of better company, I do not find it flattering to be lumped in with such as that.’